Suddenly, in the midst,
Of a seemingly beautiful day,
It makes its presence felt,
Like a slap right across the face.
I try to shake it away,
But further in, I sink.
I struggle to hold onto my sanity,
But the negatives march right in.
I try to reason out with my mind,
But in vain as I spiral into the pit.
Then the questions shootout,
Directly at me they hit.
What am I doing with my life?
Do I really matter?
Am I doing enough?
Can I do any better?
Everything that I do all day,
Does it make the slightest difference?
Is the world any nicer,
By my mere presence?
My self worth is dissected,
My very existence, questioned.
My thoughts have me cornered,
My optimism, slowly poisoned.
Then I wipe away my tears,
Tuck away my fears.
Unfurl the turmoil,
Ringing in my ears.
I wrestle my invisible demon,
And free myself of the hold.
Because life is calling,
I have got to go!
- Nandita Pai
** Somedays when I feel I am getting sucked into a whirlpool of my own thoughts, putting them down in words always helps me find a little peace.
