As I commuted to work this morning, I saw several happy excited little kids on their way to school. Today marks the new school year for many. My thoughts involuntarily raced back to the horrendous memories of the crisis that took place in Beslan, Russia in 2004. Innocent little children and adults were gunned downed by crazed terrorists. Read more about the heart wrenching incident here.
There have been several occasions in life which have left me puzzled, misunderstood, distressed, frustrated, bitter and at the end of the day absolutely clueless of what really triggered it all and wondering if at all things would get back to normal! With spirits looming low, I sullenly trudged along these phases only to realise in due course that it was all in the way I dealt with those situations that had made them so hard to handle. Had my choices of reactions been different, things would have been so much simpler. I had meekly allowed my negative energy to work its way on my mind and body and hence affect my life. Time and again I realise life is simple. It is we who complicate it.
Life did not come with a manual guiding us on how to deal with it. That is probably a reason why we resort to the easiest option to solve an issue when faced with one, which often results in only complicating it further! As paradoxical as it sounds, it is truly difficult to keep life simple! It takes patience and practise to get it right.
Let me introduce you to some notes I have penned in my life’s manual thus far:
You are awesome! Love yourself – We are our own best critics. But often times we are over judgemental of self that we lose sight of how awesome we really are! Use a few seconds of everyday, to acknowledge how blessed you feel to be the person you are. Smile at yourself in the mirror and genuinely feel good about what you see. A lot of time, effort and emotions is wasted wanting to be someone else. At those times remind yourself, no one in this world can play your role better than you!
Keep those emotions at bay! – We humans are an emotional lot! Detaching ourselves from our emotions has got to be one of the most difficult tasks for us. Emotions are good and their display is healthy. But let them not rule you, instead use them at your convenience and will. Making a decision, addressing a misunderstanding, countering a disagreement and several such instances in life require you to don on your hat of practical thinking rather than enveloping yourself in your emotions. The more you let your emotions participate in such situations, the more complex the situation seems, leaving you as an emotional wreck!
Sharpen your patience, not tongue – There are those unpleasant instances in all our lives, which we wish we could revisit to erase out those words, we lashed out in the heat of the moment. Blinded by anger, nasty words are exchanged which are deeply regretted eventually. They serve no purpose, but only scar relationships and wound hearts. Leash your tongue at these times, patience is what you need instead… patience to calm down, patience to weigh the situation and patience to collect yourself to react in a manner that is composed and matured.
Advice if you must, don’t impose – Advice is something we all are ready to offer, aren’t we? Asked for or not, we are armed with our own words of wisdom and to top it, affix expectation of adherence to it. We like to consider ourselves experts and want to be listened to. Well, this holds well when someone is really looking for your wisdom and leans over for your words of comfort. But in general, remember to give only what is asked for. Impose not your words on others. Unasked for advice by itself invites irritation and if expectation rides along… be warned, you are steering towards a danger zone!
Hang on. This too shall pass! – Nobody escapes the testing times in life. Life is a package deal. There are its highs and there are its lows. It is human weakness to wallow in self-pity and sadness, but this does anything but help overcome the situation at hand. Nobody can be rid of these episodes. They have to be faced and they are just a phase! Brace yourself with grit and optimism, and march along the darkness for sooner or later you will beam at the light waiting at the end of the tunnel! Keep in mind, if He puts you in a situation, He will show you a way out too!
to your reins – Your
life is yours; sketch it in the colours you like. If there is anybody who
should make decisions in your life, it should be you. This makes you solely
responsible for every action of yours and none else to blame. Take on the expectations,
if any thrust on you as motivators and not burden. Walk towards your own dream
and live by your own values, not somebody else’s. After all you only have this
one life to do all that you have planned for yourself. Live it up, your way!
Money doesn’t love you back! – Money can buy all the luxuries in the world, but can it buy love? The piece of paper that we created to give our lives some order needs to remain just that... a piece of paper! But, in
the times of today sadly, love and relationships are tossed into the bin in favour of
luxury and comforts in life! Little do we realise money cannot buy us happiness
and money does not love us back. Let not material comfort prioritise over the
most important aspects of your life… relationships.
Move on, live
today! – We all cherish some of fond memories of yesteryears. Just their
recollections brings with it nostalgia and warmth. Well, so long as the
memories of past bring joy to you, dwell in them as often as you like. But remember
to consciously filter out those memories that are hurting, bitter and hold you
down. Brooding over yesterday, you forget to live today. There is no way to change the past. Things have already happened. Learn to close doors and move on. Living in the present is the only way to be happy!
Yes, life really is a simple as you want it to be. And life is a never ending journey towards self-realisation. With each experience and episode in life, we figure out something new about life and self. Use these learning to make the best out of your life and you will realise how much you love it.
Happiness is a choice you make, choose to live a happy life and always remember to keep it simple silly! :)